My home on the range

Yesterday I put an ad on craigslist under "Housing Wanted". I figured it couldn't hurt to ask and I'd read in some book about a woman writing down everything she wanted on a slip of paper and letting it fly away into the wind and then getting those things she wanted, eventually.  I suppose craigslist is my virtual slip of paper in the wind.

After reading my last entry, my mom offered me some good advice - don't let my inherited "Cache Valley hurry up and work hard so we can work hard some more" mindset get to me.  Sound.

I have this remarkable opportunity, this blessing that came bigger than I ever even hoped, and I need to not begrudge myself this.  And I also have to remember that this comes with a price.  I've been really struggling with pain control despite the pain medication and I feel sick all the time and all I want to eat is ice cream, yogurt, smoothies, and milkshakes.  You know, high fat and high sugar.

I'm looking for my home on the range these days, remaining grateful, attempting to convince myself that it's okay to do what I have planned (write and heal, in a nutshell), and am remembering why it is that I get this gift in the first place.  Chronic pain sucks, that's why. :)