Off balance

I fell again tonight. I was taking Sully out for “last call” and she wanted to go faster than I was going and the grass was wet, and down I went. I lost the leash and my breath. I was so worried. It was dark and she’s a black dog. But I called her and she came back to me, good girl.

And I thought, is this going to be the one? Is the fall that will take me back to that dark place of being barely able to move, isolated and alone?

I’m stronger now. And sheer will has carried me through some pretty serious falls in the past. But it got me thinking. My life, this life that I’ve created for myself, is teetering on a precarious balance. I lose my balance all the time. But what if there is the one time that I can’t get back up?

Maybe that’s true for all of us. There is the balance, and sometimes the worry, will I get up after this fall?