Way back in 2006 one of the first doctors I saw told me that I needed to get on an antidepressant, because it wasn’t a matter of if, it was a matter of when. I followed his advice and was put on Cymbalta, a medication that is also supposed to help with the pain cycle. Last winter, after I had to take a medical leave from school, I was put on yet another antidepressant, Abilify, as I was at the maximum dosage of Cymbalta.
Things were looking really good. I was stable, not-depressed, moving forward. I had taken myself off Neurontin (and have again since my last post because I’ve been starving all the time) and my doc was concerned that Abilify was contributing to the weight issues and I’d been doing so well, so I tapered off that medication, too.
But in the last week, two weeks things haven’t been going so well. And today I’ve finally noticed just how much I’ve been sleeping! This is more than the “I need a nap because I don’t sleep through the night” sleeping. This is all the time sleeping. And homework isn’t fun. And I can’t plan forward – I have no future thinking at all.
This is one of those crap things about chronic pain management. It’s not just the pain. It’s how the pain affects every part of you, down to the neurochemicals and neuroreceptors in your brain.
Maybe by the next time I post, my dopamine and serotonin receptors will be flooded with enough manufactured neurochemicals to get back on track again.
PS I’ve added a link (to the list on the right) about the pain cycle for those who care to read more about why this is such an important consideration for dealing with chronic pain.
I am just amazed everytime you write with how much you have to deal with, and how completly encompassing this is for you.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm always so impressed with how you handle everything. I know it's not always great, but I do think you cope very well.
I admire that in you. :)